Kind Manipulation

Another excellent post from Eric Barker:

5 Non-Evil Ways To Get People To Do What You Want, From Dan Pink

how-to-deal-with-difficult-people

I’ve posted about getting people to like you, winning arguments and FBI methods for negotiation — but let’s take it to the next level.

There are ways to deal with people who are difficult but brass tacks here, folks: most of the people who cause you problems aren’t going anywhere.

You work with them, you live with them, heck, in many cases you love them, but the people closest to us can still cause a lot of problems.

How do we get them to behave better over the long haul?

I decided to call an expert. Dan Pink is the bestselling author of numerous great books about human behavior.

  • First, Get Their Attention
  • Telling People What To Do Doesn’t Work, Showing Them Does
  • Make Them Feel Something

Engaging people emotionally can be far more effective at producing change (and easier) than trying to make them think.

Dan’s team changed the disabled parking signs so they had a photo of a person in a wheelchair on them looking right at you.

This did not reduce abuse of disabled spots –it totally eliminated it.

  • When Nothing Else Works, Distract

Research shows distraction is great for reducing anger:

According to this theory, anger can be reduced indirectly by interfering with the feeling of anger rather than by dealing directly with the source of anger.

(To learn how you can use dog training methods — yes, dog training methods — to get people to change, click here.)

  • Tell Them Why 
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